Perfect Imperfection
Lately, I’ve been doing a lot of self-work. It’s not easy. In fact, it’s often messy and uncomfortable. At 61 years old, I sometimes catch myself thinking, “How have I not figured this out yet?” You’d think by now I’d have it all sorted! But then I remember — none of us ever really “arrive.” Life isn’t about reaching perfection. It’s about learning, growing, and stumbling forward with as much awareness and compassion as we can muster.
That’s what our Momentum Center core characteristic of Perfect Imperfection is all about. It’s recognizing that we are all works in progress — that growth doesn’t mean having it all together, but being honest about where we are and willing to keep doing the work. We are both perfect and imperfect in the same moment — perfectly human in all our flaws, contradictions, and attempts to do better.
Alan Watts wrote, “You are under no obligation to be the same person you were five minutes ago.” That feels like permission — to evolve, to keep learning, and to extend grace not only to ourselves but to others. When we stop expecting perfection in ourselves, it becomes easier to accept that everyone else is doing the best they can with what they have.
Recently, I had a humbling reminder of that truth. I often coach people not to fall into “idiot compassion” — the tendency to offer help because we want to feel helpful, even if it doesn’t actually serve the other person. Imagine my surprise when I realized I was doing exactly that! Jumping in where help wasn’t requested, motivated by a sense that I “should.” It made me feel better about myself, but it didn’t necessarily help anyone else. Growth can feel awkward and icky — like trying on a new version of yourself that doesn’t quite fit yet. But that’s the joy and challenge of becoming who we are meant to be.
And maybe that’s the larger lesson for all of us right now. As we face a time of real uncertainty — with SNAP benefits frozen in Michigan and many people struggling to meet basic needs — we are reminded that no one has it all figured out. We are imperfect systems full of imperfect people, trying our best. At the Momentum Center, we’re embracing that truth by doing what we can, where we are, with what we have. We’ll continue to offer weekly baking and cooking classes in both Grand Haven and Holland, along with our free dinner and movie night in Grand Haven on the second Friday of each month. Sharing food is one of the simplest ways to remind each other that we belong — that even in our perfect imperfection, we can nourish and be nourished together.
The Japanese concept of wabi-sabi is about finding beauty in imperfection and transience. In her TEDx Talk The Wabi-Sabi Path to Aging Happily, Arielle Ford invites us to let go of the impossible chase for flawlessness and instead celebrate the cracks, the scars, and the growth they represent. She describes herself as a Wabi-Sabi Queenager, and I think that maybe that's what I want to be when I grow up — perfectly imperfect, embracing change, and finding grace in all the unfinished parts of life.
Because maybe perfection was never the goal at all. Maybe the real beauty — in each of us, and in our community — lies in showing up, imperfect and wholehearted, willing to keep growing side by side and hand in hand.
Namaste,
Barbara Lee
Experi-Mentor
Barbara@MomentumCenterGH.org
